Quick Links
Categories
Archives
XML/RSS Feed
Statistics
Total entries in this blog:
Total entries in this category:
Published On: Mar 17, 2007 02:40 PM
Total entries in this category:
Published On: Mar 17, 2007 02:40 PM
Venting
I just need to vent...
Oh I just want to
vent!
It's been hard with Brian away. It's been 4 months now and it will continue for another two months. It's hard to be a single parent. Now my hat goes off to any Mom or Dad who has done this all on their own for any extended period of time. But I'm telling you it's not what nature intended.
For example, let's say your child has driven you absolutely loco. In the old days I would tell my husband (with a slight hint of satire), "I'm about to kill our daughter, could you take over for a while?" But I can't do that anymore. I am thankful for having some grandparents who help me run interference at times. But I only get two visits a week for about 4-5 hours total. The rest of the week it's just me alone, handling everything.
Things have been rough recently. The IRS has audited our 2004 taxes and sent me a letter saying that we owed them $1,800. Normally my husband handles this sort of thing. But now it's just me. I consulted our Financial Planner and our CPA. Then I searched for all of our 2004 tax records in an attempt to pin down the discrepancy. I found the mistake and found that we did not actually owe the $1,800 that the IRS said we owed. I wrote the IRS a letter disputing it. But who knows if the IRS will still come after us? I don't find Darth Vader frightening, the IRS on the other hand--they scare me!!
Then that same week a lawyer contacted me letting me know that an old employee is still suing us. My husband's business closed in 2004 after his partner embezzled over $300,000 from the business. And we still have a lawsuit pending! Again, my husband usually handles this--but I had to tell the lawyer that he was in the Army now and couldn't work on the case.
Finally, I decided to take a break on Mother's Day and I went wine tasting. While I sat back and enjoyed a fine cabernet sauvignon while munching on a picnic lunch--my husband called. I was happy to hear from him. However, the mood quickly soured when he told my daughter that he was going to war soon. My husband has only been given 2 hours of sleep a night this past week. He has been sleep deprived and I think he's mentally incoherent right now. I spent the rest of mother's day and the next day consoling my daughter a she cried her eyes out.
I did check with my husband's Unit Administrator the next day and found out that he wasn't going to war and that Brian had nothing to worry about. Double Grrr! My daughter was in tears for no reason! And even if my husband was shipping out to war that is not how you tell a child! If anything I should be told first and then we should break it to her gently. I'm so angry at him right now!
So that's what life has been like lately. Unfortunately I have now been extra angry at my daughter recently and I don't want to be. I love her dearly--but I need a break. And I can't have a break since I am the only one who really cares for her. 24/7 it's just me and her!
So here I am a single parent and not by choice. I never thought that I would be here. But I guess that I better just grin and bear it. I suppose that I should be thankful that this is only a temporary situation, not a permanent divorce.
And as I complain about all of these stressful events I am reminded of something Janice Crawford told me. She is the owner of Innovative Solutions and a mother of five kids. She said that she always hoped that the stresses would pass her by and that then things would get better. She said that they are only replaced by new stresses and that nothing really ever gets better. You just have to deal with the stresses that life places on you as they come. Just deal with them one day at a time. So I guess that I will move forward doing my best to deal with these stresses--one day at a time.
It's been hard with Brian away. It's been 4 months now and it will continue for another two months. It's hard to be a single parent. Now my hat goes off to any Mom or Dad who has done this all on their own for any extended period of time. But I'm telling you it's not what nature intended.
For example, let's say your child has driven you absolutely loco. In the old days I would tell my husband (with a slight hint of satire), "I'm about to kill our daughter, could you take over for a while?" But I can't do that anymore. I am thankful for having some grandparents who help me run interference at times. But I only get two visits a week for about 4-5 hours total. The rest of the week it's just me alone, handling everything.
Things have been rough recently. The IRS has audited our 2004 taxes and sent me a letter saying that we owed them $1,800. Normally my husband handles this sort of thing. But now it's just me. I consulted our Financial Planner and our CPA. Then I searched for all of our 2004 tax records in an attempt to pin down the discrepancy. I found the mistake and found that we did not actually owe the $1,800 that the IRS said we owed. I wrote the IRS a letter disputing it. But who knows if the IRS will still come after us? I don't find Darth Vader frightening, the IRS on the other hand--they scare me!!
Then that same week a lawyer contacted me letting me know that an old employee is still suing us. My husband's business closed in 2004 after his partner embezzled over $300,000 from the business. And we still have a lawsuit pending! Again, my husband usually handles this--but I had to tell the lawyer that he was in the Army now and couldn't work on the case.
Finally, I decided to take a break on Mother's Day and I went wine tasting. While I sat back and enjoyed a fine cabernet sauvignon while munching on a picnic lunch--my husband called. I was happy to hear from him. However, the mood quickly soured when he told my daughter that he was going to war soon. My husband has only been given 2 hours of sleep a night this past week. He has been sleep deprived and I think he's mentally incoherent right now. I spent the rest of mother's day and the next day consoling my daughter a she cried her eyes out.
I did check with my husband's Unit Administrator the next day and found out that he wasn't going to war and that Brian had nothing to worry about. Double Grrr! My daughter was in tears for no reason! And even if my husband was shipping out to war that is not how you tell a child! If anything I should be told first and then we should break it to her gently. I'm so angry at him right now!
So that's what life has been like lately. Unfortunately I have now been extra angry at my daughter recently and I don't want to be. I love her dearly--but I need a break. And I can't have a break since I am the only one who really cares for her. 24/7 it's just me and her!
So here I am a single parent and not by choice. I never thought that I would be here. But I guess that I better just grin and bear it. I suppose that I should be thankful that this is only a temporary situation, not a permanent divorce.
And as I complain about all of these stressful events I am reminded of something Janice Crawford told me. She is the owner of Innovative Solutions and a mother of five kids. She said that she always hoped that the stresses would pass her by and that then things would get better. She said that they are only replaced by new stresses and that nothing really ever gets better. You just have to deal with the stresses that life places on you as they come. Just deal with them one day at a time. So I guess that I will move forward doing my best to deal with these stresses--one day at a time.
Posted: Sat - May 20, 2006 at 04:34 PM