America: The Un-Kid Friendly Society 


My thoughts on how America marginalizes children and treats them like second-class citizens. 


My daughter and husband at a gourmet Japanese restaurant in Japan.

My husband and I were going out to a fine restaurant for brunch on "Mother's Day". I figured it was Mother's day and that on this one day throughout the year my daughter would be accepted and not condemned at the fine restaurant that we were going to.

We were going to Mace's off of Fair Oaks Blvd. in Sacramento, CA. The place is posh, but not so posh in that you could see other children in their mother's retinue that day. Here is what happened...

After we first set down to eat our meal another table was seated next to us (of middle-aged to elderly people). I smiled at them and they noticed my daughter's high chair. My daughter was not there at the time since her Dad was walking her around the restaurant. But that high chair was all they needed to see. They immediately asked for another table away from horror "KIDS!". I was extremely saddened and shocked. It was mother's day wasn't it? And they hadn't even seen my daughter who was actually on her best behavior that day.

This scene was quickly followed by another table that sat next to us that repeatedly gave us nasty looks the entire time we were there. I could understand the nasty looks if my daughter was throwing food or screaming. But she wasn't. She was talking happily (in a normal tone of voice) and most of her food actually went down her throat and not all over her high chair. Nothing was thrown, she even sang to me. Trust me, this is awesome behavior for a two-year-old!

Why is it that not even on Mother's Day is a child accepted in a nice American restaurant? I certainly resolved after this adventure to never go to Mace's again and to certainly not even bother to eat out at a nice restaurant with my daughter again (until say she was 18 years of age). But why is that? Why is it not acceptable to bring out your kids in public? This contrasts completely with France or Japan where children are regularly taken out to fine restaurants and the children are ogled and awed over during the meal. But no so in the United States. Kids are treated like lepers here.

I have heard the complaints before:
Children are noisy
Children are a mess
Children destroy my enjoyment of a fine meal

My response is remember that you were children too at one time. Would you have appreciated it if everyone treated you like a second-class citizen? How would you feel if adults treated you with disdain and told your parents to never take you in public anywhere? How would you like it if your entire childhood was spent at home and that you never could go out in public (to restaurants or movies)? Show a little flexibility please.

I certainly understand another adult being more than upset about an unruly kid throwing a temper tantrum at a fine restaurant. But if the kid isn't too loud and their food doesn't move past their high chair/plate. Then why get upset? Can't everyone have a fun time with children--even in public? 

Posted: Tue - January 24, 2006 at 10:31 AM          

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